2nd Chances....

2nd Chances.....

by Darci Escandon on Tuesday, April 6, 2010 at 9:38am

I just read something Beth Morroe wrote...actually, it was a question she posted in one of her recent blogs ( http://livingproofministries.blogspot.com/2010/01/innocence.html )

What would it be like to know that you sinned but there was no way to be forgiven?

Wow. That was such a profound question. Especially, because it hit home. 2009 was a rough year...well, actually, the last 4 months were really rough. It was especially rough on the animals of the house. In November, the week before Thanksgiving, my daughter and I came home to a horrible discovery. 2 of our dogs had managed to shut themselves up in her (our daughter) room and had managed to kill the one of our 3 family cats. I won't go into details, but it was a pretty grizzly scene.

I did what I could to help Karmann through the ordeal, afterall, this cat was her buddy, her pal. Thankfully, I have beautiful and wonderful friends who were able to come over and help me clean up the mess.

Then, on December 11th, My husband and I came home late to what looked like a murder scene. Our dog and our foster dog got into a scuffle and our dog had to be rushed to the Animal Emergency Center. The foster appeared to be ok so we just cleaned her up and made her comfortable. Early the following morning we took her to the Vet and had (The rescue that is) to make the hard choice to put her (the foster dog) to sleep. Her injuries were worse than we originally imagined.

Our dog (and our family) had to go through an aweful ordeal for a while and again, we were blessed with beautiful and wonderful friends that helped us get through that period, financially, emotionally, mentally, physically....

By that time, I was drowing in guilt because I felt I as responsible. If I had shut the cats up away from the dogs, none of this would have happened...If I had put the foster dog in her crate, away from our dogs, none of this would have happened.

The truth is, what happened was bound to happen eventually......
AND, I can feel responsible, but i don't have to drown in guilt.

Anyway, Everything was going along fine until today. The heater quit working during the night and the landlord was going to come to the house to fix it. I had already made plans to spend some time with a friend of mine, so I took the dogs for a long walk and figured I would put them in our master bedroom while the landlord was here. That way, they would be calm and less likely to make trouble. I wasn't going to be here..but it would be ok. I couldn't live in fear...Anyway, My friend arrived and I saw that one of the cats was on his perch in the living room so I put the dogs in the bedroom and left.

On the way home, I had this feeling of dread come over my entire spirit. When I got home and opened the door to the bedroom, I saw it...Cat #2, dead on the floor...same type of death...it was then that I realised that I hadn't taken the time to double check and make sure the cat was where he should have been...

I also realised which dog did it....but of course, understanding dog behavior, I couldn't punish the dog as I didn't catch him in the act and he wouldn't understand why he was in trouble. However, the dog must have felt my energy change because he tucked his tail between his legs and actually fell to the side and gave me his belly.

So, you may be wondering what all this has to do with the question Beth Moore posed. It has everything...and this is why.

Up until recently, I had been living in depression...fed by guilt. I "sinned", made some mistakes, but did not forgive myself because others couldn't forgive me.......and that is the worst feeling in the world. In addition, I have been talking to my daughter about second chances, forgiveness and such...

Here I was, face to face with a cold blooded cat killer...a dog that has already bitten one person and killed 2 cats. Do you know how easy it would have been to just put him down? But, what type of forgiveness is that? We adopted this dog knowing he had issues and needed work. Learning is a proces and often, people learn by making mistakes.

So for me, the answer to that question would be this:

What would it be like to know that you sinned but there was no way to be forgiven?
It would be like being the dog that was given up on. The dog that was put to death because his people couldn't look pass the instance instead of teaching him the correct behavior. The dog that was looking for direction and guidance but was handed death instead because it was easier to give up, walk away and not take responsibility for what they promised and pushed through and worked hard to keep the promise that they made. IT would be easier to put the dog to death and blame him for the pain and loss we are feeling...the anger, the sadness, the frustration..all of those emotions...than face the problem head on and know, that with God's strength and the help, prayer and guidance from our friends and family we would be able to work through this and teach this dog what he needed to learn....

For some of you...I know that you would say, it's just a dog....and I don't exect anyone to feel or look upon animals the way we do...but in this situation, what I see is a creature created by God who needed help...and forgivness...

I know a lot of people who want to be forgiven, who preach forgivness...but when they have been hurt....that all goes out the window. I don't want to be that person. I am not that type of person. It's not up to me to be judge and jury...it's my job to keep my word and be an example....no matter how hard that is!!

So now that you have heard my answer to this question, I am interested to know how you would answer it.